Blazblue

Where I learned about Fighting Games, Depression, and Zip-Zoom.

Ahhh Blazblue... it's hard to believe that this was my first fighting game series I ever engaged with considering my love for KOF is, but it is what it is!

Let me tell yo how I first discovered Blazblue... all the way back... in my dark and tragic past... ooooo...

It was about 2014 or 2016 and my little brother had a birthday at an arcade (it's shut down now R.I.P.) in a levee where we were let loose to play nearly any game we wanted. And the one that I gravitated to was a JP arcade machine of Blazblue: Calamity Trigger because of the anime artstyle (I was in a bit of an anti-gritty/realistic art phase). I wanted to play as the cat character since I love cats, but the game forced me to play as Jin Kisaragi.

You know, Jin, this ice king and eternal moody broody boyo.

Yeah not really the type of character I usually gravitate to, but I really didn't know at the time. In fact I was doing pretty good at the time mashing buttons at near random and trying to parse the story through the japanese words and character interactions. I only lost to Iron-Tager (more on that later), Ragna from an accident, and ultimately lost to Nu-13 as we had to leave for home.

But as I headed home, I figured that I would never see that game again. Most arcade games stay as arcade games (like some light gun and rhythm games) and there weren't alot of people that were playing the type of games that I was (mostly the crane games and gambling ones).

But they do say hindsight is 20/20 for a reason.

Fast forward to my highschool years where I was starting to come out of my social shell and began making friends online, the most important one for this story is named Teddy.

Around that time Terry Bogard was announced for SSBU and got me hooked on figuring out what he, Fatal Fury, and KOF was all about (check out my KOF page for that deep-dive). And during that time I began learning what fighting games were. So Teddy, the maliciously generous friend he is, gifted me Blazblue: Central Fiction to me on Steam and invited me to play the game with him and some other friends since he loves Blazblue.

And from there I've been a fan of fighting games. Even though I'm not a huge Blazblue fan, I can't deny it's shaped how I engage with alot of the genre and some expectations of it. For better or for worse.

So About Those Expectations (And Depression, you doing okay?)

Don't worry, I'm okay (for the most part) but I feel like that I should talk about first.

Given how this was my first fighting game, I wasn't the best at it at all (don't think I'm that good now but still). I did have some early victories, but way more devastating defeats as I experimented with the cast and learned the ropes.

Especially one night where I was trying out a super technical charater and proceeded to lose about 20 times in a row. Overtime I devolved into a puddle of tears and the worst thoughts. I had thoughts and instances like that before, but not as strong as that before. It was so bad that I went to my parents and asked what I could do about these feelings.

To which I got a hearty: "Well you're weak for getting sad over a video game."

And yeah I guess it is silly to cry over a game, but like I didn't get anything useful to go off of, essentially just a, "You're bad and you should feel bad for feeling bad" when I needed help. So needless to say I kept alot of my negative feelings to myself after that.

Unfortunately this isn't the end of depression and Blazblue being intertwined for me. Because while I continued to play the game - cuz it's fun - I began to play outside of my friend circle and into public player lobbies where I was expectedly demolished by people a thousand times better than me. I continually felt like I was pathetic and worthless at this game I enjoyed and made me question if I even deserved to play and have fun. At my worst, I'd play against people so I could intentionally lose against people just to reinforce how horrible I was as not just a player but a person.

Eventually, I got better and now I can play Central Fiction without those feelings of deep depression and self-punishment (in games anyway). With every new FG I get into I go through a miniature version of this cycle, but I've grown much more as a person. Central Fiction has unintentionally shaped me as a person on an emotional front where I'm not the best at dealing with defeat or sadness but I can recover pretty well.

Alright enough with the sappy stuff, lets talk about the funny anime game again.

With how fast paced and aggressive Blazblue: Central Fiction is, it ingrained within me an unfair standard of how fast or mobile a fighting game should be. I say unfair because alot of fighting games are much much slower and are more about careful planning or zoning, and this expectation has backfired me in a couple instances (SF6 and UMvC3).

Though what I figure is the greatest influence on how I approach fighting games, look no further than...

Taokaka

This is the first character that I ever mained and will continue to main in Blazblue because she plays pretty much perfectly. She's simple to pick up, simple to combo with, and goes oh so fast. So fast that I coined a term to define it, "Zip-Zoom". When something in a game lets you go fast in a simple, kinetic, and satisifyingly fun way it's a Zip-Zoom.

And aside from Zip-Zoom, Tao as a character is so addictively fun and joyful to see and watch both in the story and in gameplay. She's influenced what type of characters I gravitate towards in video games, happy-go-lucky or cute characters that some draw to me. And I go towards them less for their gameplay or viability and more for their persona (though there have been times where that's not the case). Especially given how Taokaka is a low tier in the game but I still love playing as her regardless.

Another thing that Blazblue set my standards for was online play. Like I said, I went online and got obliterated nearly every single time I stepped out of my bubble, but that wasn't the only thing that I took notice of. If you've never played Blazblue, it may come as a shock that you don't fight alot of people in the big online lobbies that allow tons and tons of people to coexist at once. Instead, most people create public player lobbies that host about 8 people max. And these player lobbies are a little room that the host designed themself with decor and such from gacha machines (wish you could just straight up buy stuff like this but it is what it is).

And the one thing that I've noticed that people, en-mass, HATE decorating. They just hate it! Like you could not comprehend how many times I've joined a random player lobby and it's the default white void room with no furniture, it's infuriating!!!! I know that alot of people only care about the fighting part about fighting games, but like don't you want to have fun in a little place that is... you know, fun? And not the most boring room in the world. Same feeling I have when people chose the Training Stage over other stage. Like if it's a connection issue then sure, I get why we're playing there, if not then I hate you. Especially in Blazblue, there's so many beautiful and exciting stages that run fantastically, but you wanna play in the Backrooms of Fighting Game stages. I don't get it, and it bores/miffs me.

Some of My Favorites From Blazblue

- And Now the Mausks -

Anywho, have fun if you can : D